Democrats: We're here to fix the economy! Spend spend spend! Republicans: Ummm... your spending won't create jobs.... Democrats: HITLER!! Yes it WILL!! Watch!!! (.........) Republicans: It doesn't appear to be wor- Democrats: SHUT UP HITLER!! Watch.... (.........) Republicans: See, the auto bailout still lead to bankru- Democrats: SHHHH!!! It's not the stimulus fault! It's those evil corporations sending jobs and money overseas!!! Republicans: Well, but Chevrolet got a lot of money and they are still in bad shape.. Democrats: Nuh uh! Republicans: They're not? Democrats: Nope... we sold them to Fiat. Republicans: You wha- Democrats: -SHHHHH!!! Watch something is happening.... (.........) Republicans: Yeah, it's not working... and now we are 33% more in debt American People: Yeah, it appears there is something to the Republican argument... let's not spend so much... Democrats: I really think you slack jawed yokels clinging to God and guns should give us some more time. American People: Hmmmm.... Nope. Republicans: Hey thanks American people! American People: You're only here because the other option is Ralph Nader. Republicans: Ah, check! Ok, then... well, first things first, lets stop spending so much Democrats: What just happened?! Is this because of the Palin Death panels? Because that was totally false. Republicans: Heh, yeah... funny though. American People: Well, yeah, but really... it's about the debt. We're just not seeing a return on our great grand children's investment. Republicans: Well, we're living beyond our means... we should likely rethink how we're going to provide federal servic- Democrats: -AGH!!! You are really going to kill all old folks!? Surely, American People, you hate them for this right?! American People: ...... Democrats: No look, I have some charts and graphs... if you look you will see that it's all Bush's fault... American People: Yeah, that's why we voted for you. Democrats: And we totally fixed shit, ya know? American People: ...... Democrats: Anyway, Spending a shit ton didn't fix as much as we thought.... so let's tax someone, that always makes us feel better. Republicans: So NOW you give a shit about deficits!? Democrats: (whisper) not really... shhhhhhh... Republicans: So anyway, the stimulus didn't work s- Democrats: -What?! If the stimulus isn't working then explain how it is that Osama is dead! Republicans: Boom! Head shot. American People: USA USA USA! Democrats: UN UN UN... I mean USA USA USA! Republicans: Ok, but seriously, we need to cut the budget. Democrats: Nah... the great thing about huge defict budgets is they eventually cut themselves. Republicans: ....... American People: ........ Democrats: HEY LOOK OVER THERE!! IT'S GADDAFI!! Republicans: Wha- Democrats: QUIET YOU!! We have civilians to save!! BIEW BIEW Republicans: ... Ummm.. have we thought this thr... Democrats: BIEW BIEW BIEW Republicans: Ummm.. seriously, who are we protecting again? Democrats: The peace loving free people of Libya! Rebels: Yeah, US! Republicans: And who are you? Rebels: Democracy lovers, duh! Republicans: Wait... don't I recognize you from some wanted poste- Democrats: Stop talking crazy.. they love peace and democracy... and recoilless rifles... Rebels: Hey, we're kinda pinned down guys... can you send some bigger guns? Democrats: Have no fear! We've called FRANCE! Rebels: ....... well, anyway, until then I suppose we can take care of that black African problem we have. Auslanders aus, amiright? Republicans: .. wait, you mean like Nazis? Rebels: Yeah, you Americans... you were the ones that were Nazis, right? Democrats: Might as well have been with Bushitler! Republicans: WHAT? NO! That was the Germans. Rebels: Oh... well, all you infidels look alike. Republicans: All us what? Democrats: OOOPS! Connection lost... these darn NATO radios... always make you sound all staticy... and jihadist-y.. OH Hey, anyway... forget about Libya. We may actually really just hate Yemen... Republicans: FINALLY! Maybe we can pressure the Yemeni goverment to... Democrats: What? No, we hate the Yemeni Government... Republicans: ... In favor of who? Democrats: Yemeni Rebels, silly.... Yemeni Rebels: ALAHU AKBARRRR!! WE NEED GUNS TO DEFEAT INFIDEL LOVING RUL- Democrats: Ah dang... lost connection again. But I could have sworn I heard something about loving in there... they're so cute. American People: ........ ummm.. jobs? Democrats: GEORGE BUSH!! American People: That isn't an answer... Democrats: Of course it is silly.. it's the answer to everything... American People: ...... Democrats: Or sometimes Dick Cheney. Dealers choice really. Republicans: So yeah, about the jobs... Government spending isn't the way to go. Democrats: Totally agree with you there. We need to tax the rich. Republicans: Huh? How does that create jobs. Democrats: Well, we take money out of Corporate coffers.. and we spend it o- Republicans: You waht? I thought you agreed with me that spending wasn't th- Democrats: Seriously I thought you we kidding about wanting to kill all old and young people. Republicans: What? Democrats: Seriously, watch this ad, it explains it pretty well (hits play) Video: "In a world where one man... BUSH... wants all Republicans to eat old and young people, Democrats are the only power strong enough to-" Republicans: Ok, that's it, you people are nuts... Democrats: No wait, watch... there's a clever Venn Diagram that shows exactly how much "Republican" means "Hitler"... it's rather compelling. Both Republican AND Hitler are blue.. the similarity is uncanny. Republicans: Fuck it, I'm done. Cut spending or we don't raise the debt ceiling Democrats: BUSHITLER CHENEY WITH GUNS TO HEADS TERRORISTS MOTHER COCKERS!! Republicans: Whatever... Democrats: Pretty please? American People: .... So is Nader running?